The Beginning of the End?
by JodiCatherine
Summary: Beatrice Prior was your typical care free child, until one day changed her life. Now fighting for her life, how will she handle saying goodbye to all she knows and the ones she loves. What happens when she returns seven years later but decides to keep up with the lies? How will she handle the guilt and fight for her life at the same time? *first fanfic, don't judge before you read*
1. Chapter 1

**My first Fanfic so please don't hate! I got this idea after a dream I had and felt the need to finally write it all out. I Don't Own Divergent!**

My name is Beatrice Prior. And at the age of ten I was diagnosed with leukemia. It was the last day of school and I was running around the streets with all my best friends like we did at the end of every week or school year. Usually me and Tobias would speed past everyone while Christina, Marlene, Shauna, Lynn, and Will followed behind us trying to catch up. We all quickly gave up on Zeke and Uriah as they would always tackle each other and turn it into another one of their stupid competitions. But for some reason that day I fell behind everybody and it wasn't until I was on my knees gasping for air that anyone seemed concerned enough to help. Tobias ran to me, concern evident in his eyes, as he picked me up and ran me back to my house where he barged in startling both my parents. My parents rushed me to the emergency room leaving Tobias and all my friends behind. That's when they decided to do some tests and when nothing seemed to make sense the doctors tested my blood as a last resort. That night at precisely 9:27 I was told the news. My mom cried into my dad's shoulder as my dad asked the doctor question after question. As for me; I just sat there and stared at the clock as each second, each minute, each hour passed realizing it could all end too soon.

* * *

I went home that night and laid in bed staring at the ceiling of my room. I could hear my mother's sobs from down the hall, and my father's comforting words. I could still see the look of shock and pity on my brother's face as we told him the news. I learned at that moment that I hated pity, and knew there was only one way to get away from it. Lie.

So the next day instead of telling my friends that I would be in the hospital for a week or more going through chemo and testing my blood to find more answers, I decided to keep it simple. I was going on a surprise vacation that I didn't know how long would last. I learned at that moment that I hated how easy it was to lie to them all. And how simple it was. I had a panic attack as a result from stress and my parents decided that we all needed a break so they surprised Caleb and me with a vacation to who knows where for who knows how long. As I hugged them all good bye and they all left I started to walk home. But I had to stop when my vision became to blurry from the tears threatening to fall. I figured I was a safe distance away and just sat below a tree and let the tears fall freely. It wasn't until I looked up to see a pair of dark blue eyes staring at me with concern that I realized Tobias was there.

"Where are you really going Bea?"

Bea, that was his nickname for me while mine for him was Toby. I was the only one allowed to call him Toby or even Tobias. To all of our friends he was Four. The nickname started when he had to wear the thick glasses, so Zeke got everybody to call him four eyes, he acted like he didn't like it, which made everyone want to call him it even more, but in reality I knew he enjoyed the new identity. Because Four had no relation to Marcus, the monster he has to call his father. Anyway, it definitely helped when he got the number four as a jersey when he started sports. From the coaches calling him four to our group calling him it the name eventually stuck. Now I'm the only one to call him by his true name when we are alone because he told me I was allowed.

I looked into his dark blue eyes and began to drown in them. My growing feelings for him that I kept secret were not helping me in this matter and I only began to cry more. Toby sat beside me and pulled me into a hug. When I finally calmed down enough to stop crying he asked me again.

"I told you Toby, I'm going on a surprise vacation."

I looked him in the eyes pleading with him to stop prying, but I knew he was just as stubborn as me.

"You're my best friend Bea. I can tell you're hiding something from me. If you were just going on vacation then why are you crying like this?"

Now I realized I was at a cross roads, how would I be able to explain this to him. I choose to ignore the pang in my chest I felt as I heard him call me his best friend and choose to just get out of there before I broke down again.

"It's nothing Toby, don't worry so much. I'm probably just having another panic attack or something. Now I have to go finish packing."

I got up and brushed the imaginary dust off my pants as I turned to hug him good bye. But what happened next is what took me by surprise. As I hugged Toby he leaned down and whispered in my ear,

"Whatever it is Bea, know you could trust me with your life."

He pulled back a little and looked me in the eyes, long enough for me to notice the tears he was trying to hold back, and I'm almost positive I failed at any attempt to hold back mine. Then after what seemed like an eternity he kissed me on the cheek, turned, and walked away. Leaving me there in a state of pure shock as I tried to register what just happened.

As I walked back home only one thought was racking my brain. Does Toby have feelings for me too? And if he did, why did it have to happen as I started to adventure with the thing that could possibly end my life, cancer.


	2. Chapter 2

I've been in the hospital for a about two weeks now. I am currently sitting in my hospital room alone while my parents go to get food with Caleb. If there is one thing I've learned in this past week it is that I hate hospitals, and having to stay in the same bed in the same room for a long period of time does not help the matter.

One up side to all this is that I became close to one of the volunteers here. Her name is Tori and she is the only one that actually treats me like a normal human around here.

_FLASHBACK_

I have only been here for around two days and I have already tried to figure out an escape plan. I usually have the same nurses and doctors checking in on my so when a new face peers into my room I don't know what to expect.

"Hi sweetheart, what's your name?" She seemed nice enough and I was alone so I didn't see any harm, I mean, what's there to lose anyway, right?

"I'm Beatrice!" She smiled even more at this took that as her cue to fully come into my room and sit next to my bed.

"Well, Beatrice sound a little to old now doesn't it? And you're not old, you're a young, brave girl. A warrior. A fighter. How about we start calling you Tris? That seems to suit you better." Tris, I liked it! And I guess the smile on my face gave her the reassurance she needed because her face lit up. "Well, _Tris_, my name is Tori and I'm a volunteer here. But I haven't seen you around so I figured I would introduce myself."

I could already feel myself beginning to like Tori, and when I look at what was in her lap I couldn't help but let my curiosity get the best of me.

"What's that book you're holding?" It seemed too thick to be a kids book, but too large to be a novel. And from the looks of it, it looks like she doodled all over the cover and most of the pages.

"Well, this Tris is my sketchbook. You seem I like to draw and paint and all that. I'm a new art teacher up at the high school, and on my spare time I'm a tattoo artist." The awe in my eyes must have been noticeable because the next thing I know Tori's offering to teach my how to draw whenever she's at the hospital. She even offered to buy my own sketchbook. I didn't know what to say so I just vigorously nodded my head at Tori with a smile so bog I'm surprised my face didn't break.

_END FLASHBACK_

From that day forward I had something to actually look forward to. And according to Tori I'm a natural artist. I use my sketchbook as a way to distract my from where I am and why I'm there. So, as I wait here for my parents to get back I just plug in my earphones, play some music, and begin to draw. Since drawing has become my greatest distraction, and my way to let all my emotions show, I'm already a quarter of the way done with my first sketchbook.

When my parents walk in with Dr. Murray I immediately know something's wrong. My mother sits next to me on my bed and begins to stroke my hair as she tells me that the test results are back.

It turns out I have acute myeloid leukemia, or AML. And with this type of leukemia I have a seventy percent chance of remission and during chemo I have to stay in the hospital for about a month. I also found out that although Dr. Murray is an expert in this field that he suggests we move to their sister hospital in California. When I asked why he simply put that although he's the best I would not only get just as good care there but I would be more comfortable considering that it's a pediatric hospital. My parents quickly agreed with him despite my pleas to stay because they felt that if I was to be stuck in a hospital for months at a time at least I could be around other kids, unlike here.

I was to leave the hospital tomorrow and be in California by the end of the week so I can get started on my chemo faster. I refused to talk to anyone who agreed to this so I wouldn't even look at my parents, doctors, or nurses. The only person I would let near me was Tori, so she agreed to stay the night with me.

I cried the whole night. I didn't want to leave my home, my school, my friends, or most of all Tobias. When I was getting ready to leave Tori pulled me in for a much needed hug and told me something I will never forget. She said, "I will see you again Tris. I don't know where and I don't know when. But I do know that I will see you again and you will be a strong, healthy, and beautiful girl who will love her life. I know you doubt yourself but I have enough hope for the both of us. I know you will make it out of this and you can tell me I was right when I see you again." I asked how she could be so sure, and she gave me a simple answer that I will always keep close to my heart. She answered me saying, "Because, Tris, you are a warrior. Now go and be brave." And with that I walked out of the hospital with a newfound determination. I was going to get past this and it wasn't going to be for me, it was going to be for all those who love me and have hope in me as well.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you all so much for the follows, favorites, and reviews! I honestly didn't think I would get any so to get some after only two chapters really motivates me to continue this. I already have the next few chapters written so I will try to post them as quickly as possible for you. Thank you again! Enjoy!**

* * *

My dad and Caleb left a few hours ago. They went with the truck so that by the time my mother and I got there everything would be transferred from the truck to the house. My mother and I stayed back to do a few last minute things like double check the house and hand our keys in.

As my mother was in the house handing in our keys and signing the last few papers she needed to I was outside taking in the scenery of my childhood neighborhood for the last time. That's when I heard someone calling my name. As I looked over my shoulder I saw Tobias running towards me, but he stopped short when he saw the empty house and for sale sign on the front lawn. I couldn't handle it. This was the one thing I was trying to prevent. I decided to meet him halfway so that if it became needed I would have somewhere to run away to. As I got closer I saw the tears forming in his eyes and tried my hardest to prevent my already formed tears from spilling.

"Wha-What's going on Bea?" I looked at the ground, I refused to look into his eyes because I knew once I did I was a goner.

"I'm moving. I wasn't planning on telling you so please don't tell anyone else anything!" I practically begged him. The confusion was evident on his face but he seemed to understand that there was no stopping this from happening. He had no choice but the accept it.

"Well, I was coming to welcome you back from vacation, but I guess it's just another goodbye then, huh?" I finally had the nerve to look up and him and I felt the tears begin to fall.

"You have to know how much I don't wanna go. How much I tried to convince them to stay. I didn't wanna leave my home, my school, my friends. You." I practically whispered the last word but I'm assuming he heard it because once it left my mouth he looked a little shocked and his cheeks tinted the slightest shade of pink.

"Well don't worry Bea. I know we will see each other again because there is no way I'm letting anybody take you away from me." He said as he pulled me into a big bear hug. When he pulled away he reached into his back pocket and place something around by neck. I looked down in confusion to find a puzzle piece charm on a long necklace chain. Looking up I noticed he had one similar around his neck too. "I saw these while you were away. I didn't like that I couldn't come down here and see you whenever I wanted so when I saw these I thought it was a great way to know that we will always have a piece of each other no matter where we are. Of course I only thought we would be separated during vacations but obviously that's not the case now." I looked down at the ground in shame. I broke my best friends heart, how could I live with myself after this? He put his finger under my chin to life my head up for our eyes to meet. "I don't know when but I do know that we will see each other again Bea. And when we do I will be waiting to put these pieces together again." He then took my charm and his and I realized that they fit together. Two pieces to the perfect puzzle. Smiling I held the two pieces together in my hand and said, "I'll be back again. So don't try to miss me too much." Tobias chuckled softly to himself as a smile began to spread across his face. "Oh I wont Bea. So instead of goodbye I'm gonna say see you again." And I hugged him as tight as I could hoping I wouldn't have to let go. He pulled back looked me right in the eyes and gave me something I never thought imaginable from him, a kiss. Although it was more of a quick pect it was still soft and spoke the thought we didn't dare say out loud. And with one last look he began to walk backwards as I stood there shocked to what just happened. But as a smile spread across my face, one spread across his as well, as he whispered a final, "See you soon Bea." Then as he turned around I could've sworn I head a faint, I love you, but it was probably just my imagination.

My mother came out a minute later calling my to the car to leave. And as we pulled away I held the puzzle piece in my hand and silently made a promise to myself. A promise that I was gonna fight this thing. I was gonna fight it not only for myself but for Tobias, because I was not ready to leave him. Not just yet.


	4. Chapter 4

_7 YEARS LATER_

It's been seven years since I moved to California, seven years since I left my life in Chicago behind, seven years since I've seen Tori or any of my friends, seven years since I've said bye to Tobias, seven years since I found out I had cancer.

I went through chemo a few times in these past few years. I practically live at this hospital and I've come to the conclusion that I hate it. I'm seventeen years old, a junior in high school, and they still treat me like a child. I guess that's what I should expect being in a pediatric hospital and all, but I can still complain. My once long blonde hair is now in a pixie cut. It took a lot of getting used to. No more pony tails, no more braids. I cried for a week. My mother had to show my how to style it different ways just to get me to come to some sort of acceptance that I would have no choice but the wait for it to grow back. I mean I guess a pixie is better than no hair at all. And I have grown to like the easy maintenance.

* * *

Today we had our monthly doctor consultation. Time to find out what was wrong with me this time. I have been in remission for about a month now but the doctors do say that there is a good chance of my cancer coming back at some point. Dr. Murray is still one of the head doctors on my case. During these monthly appointments he always makes a point to be there through skype. Today is just like all the other appointments as I sit in a chair next to my parents as they make small chat with my doctor while we wait for the video chat to load.

Little did I know that this appointment would change my life for the better. I don't want to bore you with the details so I'm going to keep it simple. I have been in remission for a month and I am pretty stable to be on my own. There is a great chance that my cancer will come back and they say that when it does it could get pretty ugly. Meaning lots of blood and, well, blood. They can sense my continuous discomfort with the hospital so they suggest moving back to Chicago to be with Dr. Murray at my original hospital.

Turns out my dad got offered a higher position from his original office back in Chicago so he will be able to accept the job and my mom only works part time to be able to take care of me so moving around doesn't make a difference to her. Luckily our old house is for sale again so we will be moving back there. I was also cleared stable enough by the doctors to go back to high school. Since I've been in and out of the hospital so much it was just easier to be home schooled the past seven years, but since I am stable and now have enough knowledge of my condition to be able to take care of myself the doctors found nothing wrong with public school. Having Caleb in the same grade and school did help persuade them though.

We move back in a week and a half, then I go back to school in two weeks. It is currently October so they are already a month into the school year. But no matter when I showed up I would be getting looks for being the new girl so might as well embrace it and make a fashionably late grand entrance.

_WEEK AND A HALF LATER_

As we drive away to Chicago I can't help but grab onto the puzzle necklace that I never take off my neck. I smile as I realize that I will finally get to see Tobias again and hope that he hasn't given up hope on my because I know for sure that I haven't given up on him.

_TWO WEEKS LATER_

As I lay in bed the night before I start school again I realized something. My friends are going to ask where I've been and I don't know how I'm going to answer them. And on top of that what happens if my cancer does come back? The doctors said it's a pretty big chance it'll come back and when it does it's going to be ugly. As I toss and turn for at least two hours I come to a simple conclusion. As much as it pains me I can't tell my friends who I really am until I've been in remission for at least six months, because after being cancer free for six months the chances it comes back are minimal enough that I can risk them knowing who I am.

I am going to enter school as someone they have never met before, someone they wouldn't recognize.

Tris.

Strong Tris,

Warrior Tris,

Brave Tris.


	5. Chapter 5

**You guys have been so amazing to me with all these reviews and favorites and follows. I honestly didn't know what to expect when I started this I just woke up remembering a part of a dream and couldnt get it out of my mind without writing it out. That's when I decided to do this. I really wasn't expecting people to like it so much let alone leave such wonderful reviews like you all have. As a big thank you I decided to post another chapter for you all and might possibly get one up again tomorrow ;) Well, I know yoh don't want to be reading this so... ENJOY!**

* * *

I wake up to my alarm blaring. I haven't had to wake up for school in seven years, this will definitely take some getting used to. As I roll out of bed I don't even dare to look at myself before walking into the bathroom and showering. As I stand under the hot water I finally have some time to come to the realization of what today is and let the nerves fully sink in. It's my first day of high school, like ever. I haven't been to public school since I was ten when our parents would walk us to our classrooms. With this realization I quickly finish up and hope out of the shower, drying off my body and throwing my towel wrap on. I start by simply drying my hair and brushing it out. Another up side to the pixie cut is that it takes a total of two minutes to do my hair after the shower. I them brush my teeth and add some simple makeup; light eye shadow, eyeliner, and mascara; nothing drastic. I then decide to go simple but cute for my outfit. Black skinny jeans, black combat boots, and a nice dark blue sweater; and as always my puzzle necklace. After one last look in the mirror I give myself a reassuring nod and smile and walk downstairs to meet up with Caleb.

* * *

I cant help but feel a little overwhelmed walking through the hallways of this school. Even now when they are empty I am nervous, I don't even want to image them with crazy teenagers crowding them. Because of my cancer the principal asked me and Caleb if we could have a quick meeting with her then she would give us a pass to our first period classes.

The meeting basically consisted of going over what we would do in an emergency. We decided that the teacher would call Caleb to wherever I was first then he would help me and we would figure out from there if it was necessary to go to the nurse and call an ambulance or just for me to go to the nurse then decided to go home or not. The principal said she notified all my teachers that in case of an emergency to call Caleb and listen to whatever we tell them to do. Based off my request she kept the cancer part a secret and simply stated health issues in her email. As her and Caleb went more into details I decided to look over my schedule, considering I didn't need to worry because I would most likely be too out of it if something did happen to even remember any of these details. My schedule seemed pretty decent for a high school junior.

**TRIS PRIOR**

**JUNIOR**

**1-ART TORI**

**2-SCIENCE MATTHEWS**

**3-HISTORY KANG**

**4-GYM AMAR**

**5-LUNCH**

**6-OFF**

**7-ENGLISH RUSSO**

**8-MATH SCHULTZ**

**9-OFF**

Luckily the school agreed to changing my name to Tris for most of my records so I didn't have my name to worry about. As I looked at my schedule one thing seemed to pop in my head. _"Well, this Tris is my sketchbook. You seem I like to draw and paint and all that. I'm a new art teacher up at the high school, and on my spare time I'm a tattoo artist." _Tori! As I realized she was my art teacher I knew there was something I had to do. So I decided to just interrupt my brother and principal because in all honestly I wasn't even paying enough attention to know what they were blabbing on about.

"Excuse me, sorry. But do you mind if I add another name to the list of who to call in case of an emergency? After they call Caleb of course." Caleb looked completely lost while the principal seemed to consider it.

"Of course, do you mind if I ask who and why?"

"Of course not. But I would like to add my art teacher, Tori." Now caleb was completely lost.

"Beatrice, why would you add a teacher that you haven't even met yet who doesn't even know about your cancer? How could she possibly be any help if she is just going to ask questions the whole time!"

"Because Caleb, Tori was a volunteer at the hospital when I was ten and she stayed with me practically the whole time. She knows everything about what to do and what is wrong with me. I trust her with my life and she could help you when it comes to the staff because we all know that they wont listen to you even if the email says too!" Now I was getting pissed. He knows not to call me Beatrice, and why would he doubt me I'm the one who's life would be on the line, not him. "And it's Tris, not Beatrice. Don't EVER call me that again!" I hissed at him. He simply nodded in agreement as the principal added Tori's name to the paperwork and email.

* * *

After about ten more minutes we got our passes and went our separate ways to our classes. As I made it to the door I noticed it was cracked open a bit and decided to peek in first and see what I would be dealing with. The students all sat at tables looking bored as Tori stood at the front of the class in front of a board going over as assignment and attendance. She seemed to just be finishing up attendance when she addressed the class. No one was even looking near the door, all too distracted by Tori and boredom, so I took this as my chance to slip in.

"All right class it seems we are going to have a new student today. She should be here soon so I hope you all welcome her to our school and this class especially with open arms. Her name is…" As Tori looked down at the sheet her eyes widened and she seemed too shocked to notice the rest of the class looking at her expectantly.

"What's the chicks name? Is it really that hard to pronounce or something?" Some random kid asked. Tori was too caught up in her own mind to even hear him. "Hello, Tori! What's this girls name?" I took this as my chance to announce my presence.

"My name's Tris."

The entire class turned their attention to me and Tori looked up with teary eyes and gasped.

"This is a dream right?" At her reaction I found myself getting teary eyed too and just smiled at her, answering her in the best way possible.

"You said I was a warrior, and now here I am standing tall and brave just like you said I would." At that I ran to Tori and we hugged, both crying, not caring that the entire class was staring at us in complete and utter confusion right now. Tori pulled away and grabbed some tissues for the two of us. Handing me some.

"I told you I would see you again. I knew you were strong enough to make it through _Tris_." She said putting extra emphasis on my name as a smile spread across her face.

"Um may I ask what the heck just happened? Because I think I speak for everyone when I say that whatever this little reunion was just caught us all off guard and left us in utter confusion." Some boy yelled out.

"Oh shut up Zeke! Everyone go back to you assignments I need to speak with Tris here." The she turned to look at me. "Tris you can put your stuff down at that empty seat in the back table over there then come up here so we can talk, okay?" I looked back to where she was pointing and my breath hitched. Sitting at that table were my old friends, Christina, Will, Zeke, Marlene, and Shauna. And sitting next to the empty seat was the one and only Tobias. He's changed since I last saw him, taller, more muscular, definitely grown from a little boy figure to a young man figure, but who am I to talk? I look nothing like I did at ten. Not only have I grown into my body but I was always slightly paler than normal from the constant blood loss and the most obvious was my signature long hair that I lost. Tori noticed my hesitation and put a hand on my shoulder pulling me out of my own thoughts.

"Everything okay Tris?" I just nodded and walked over to the table trying my hardest not the make eye contact with any of them. I knew lying to them would be hard but I didn't even think of this as a possibility. I knew from this moment on I would have to deal with the guilt of becoming friends with my old best friends again, all while living a complete and total lie.


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay, like I said here is the next chapter. This is the last chapter I have that is pre-written, although I di have the next few chapters planned out I have yet to actually write them. I don't know when I will get the chance to write them considering I have orientation for school this weekend then I start school next week. So I may only get to like a chapter or two a week until I get more in the flow and make a proper writing schedule. I apologize ahead of time for the wait no matter how long it is(whether one day or one week), but if you keep up with the reviews they truly do motivate me knowing there are people out there reading this who are begging me for more. it makes it seem like I'm doing this for a reason. I love you all and promise to figure out a schedule soon! I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

I quickly put my books down at the table without making eye contact with any of my friends. I had to focus on Tori now and I would not let my guilt distract me.

As I walked back up to Tori the silence in the room was beginning to get to me. I really hoped that the class would lose interest and fast because I don't know if I can talk to Tori while continuing to keep my cancer a secret.

"I'm going to take this as my opportunity to say I told ya so." Tori said with a smirk as she pulled me into another hug. I smiled knowing she still had that carefree personality.

"Well, I really wanted to keep up my end of the deal to tell you that you were right," I said returning her smirk. "And the only way to do that was to fight my way here. Now I guess it was worth it all to hear you say one sentence." I joked with Tori and as I answered her she began to chuckle.

"I see you still have the same sense of humor Tris. Good to see not too much has changed."

"Wait, how do you two know each other? And why are you crying? What is going on? I need answers!" I turned to see Zeke standing up from his chair waving his arms around dramatically. Tori could sense my discomfort and when the class continued to listen in on our conversation she decided to take matters into her own hands.

"That, Zeke, is personal and between me and Tris. What is our business is our business and no one else's', understood?" Tori gave him a death glare that definitely got her warning across because Zeke immediately sat back down in his seat nodding silently. "Now, since none of you seem to notice a private conversation when you see one I am going to allow you all to continue working on your assignments out in the court yard. Let's go!" Tori then leaned down to whisper in my ear, "Now we can separate ourselves to talk privately from the curious ears of your new classmates." I gave her a look of thanks and she just nodded in understanding.

* * *

As we walked out to the court yard I decided to fall behind the rest of the class. You could definitely tell who was in what friend group just based off of how much they all separated into different cliques and how one group never even glanced at the other groups. As the rest of the students ran to different parts of the yard I felt Tori pull me into the outer most corner.

"So, tell me everything. I haven't stopped thinking about you since that day we said goodbye and now that I get the chance catch up with you I will not let it go to waste." She seemed like a teenage girl asking for the latest high school gossip. It made me laugh a little knowing at least someone didn't see me as the dying girl with cancer.

"Well I guess ill keep it simple considering I cant possible fit seven years of details into thirty minutes of class." She nodded eagerly wanting to hear what she's missed in my life. "Well, as you know I moved to Cali to go to the pediatric hospital, and let me tell you I hate children's' hospitals. I mean even when I was sixteen they still treated me like I was six! The nurses would talk to me like I could barely understand them and even though I could technically drive if I wanted too I for some reason wasn't allowed to leave my room without an adult present. I mean, really?! Anyway, I went through chemo a few times as you can probably tell by my hair." I say as making waving motions around my head. "I have been in remission for a month and the doctors agreed that since I am stable enough and both me and Caleb not only know enough about my condition but both go to the same school that I was allowed to attend here." At the sound of me being in remission and stable Tori immediately perks up. "I will be heading back to the original hospital with Dr. Murray from now on, but there is something important you need to know." Tori's once happy face slowly began to grow more worried knowing with cancer that that sentence never means good news. "They say that there is a good chance that the cancer could come back and when it does it wont be pretty. In one word they described it with; blood. We don't know if it will defiantly come back and if it does when so as you probably saw from the principal's email if its during school the teacher is to immediately call caleb and do whatever we, or mostly him, tell them to do. However, you and I both know that no one will take either of us seriously so I asked for you to be added onto that list. Meaning that if anything is to happen both you and caleb will be called down to help me. I hope that's okay with you." I tried to read her face for any reaction but found none. Of course she wouldn't wanna help me, I mean why would she want to be called out of her class to come help poor little old me?

"Of course you can keep my name on the list Tris! I'm just so appreciative that you would want me there to help." Tori then gives me one of the tightest hugs I thing I've ever receive.

"Oh, and one last thing Tori?"

"Yeah?" Now the worried expression returned. Probably assuming the worst, that I have more bad news.

"Do you think you could keep the cancer a secret? As of now the only people in the school that know are me, caleb, you, the principal, and possibly the nurse. I'm not entirely sure though. I just would rather wait because for all we know it might not return and I don't want the pity."

"Yeah, I'll do that Tris but I have to ask. Do your old friends know? I remember you told me in the hospital that you lied and they thought you were on vacation and how you planned to leave without even telling them that you came back from you "vacation." But don't you think they deserve to know you're back and okay?" I thought this over for a second before coming back to my usual conclusion.

"If I find out after about six months that I'm still cancer free then I'll tell them who I am. But for now all they need to know is that I am Tris, the new student from California. I just don't want their pity." With that I looked around the court yard and caught a pair of familiar dark blue eyes staring at me. I stared right back at them as I subconsciously grabbed my puzzle necklace that I have yet to take off to this day. In his eyes I saw something I was wishing I wouldn't. I saw the question of recognition, and a hint of hope. I should have know there was no hiding from him. After all as I looked at his neck he wore a similar puzzle necklace. I was staring into the eyes of the one and only Tobias, and I just couldn't bring myself to turn away. Not just yet. Not again.


	7. Chapter 7

**Okay. I understand that it has been a week and I would like to apologize now. I know I did say I would have a schedule planned but in all honesty I was just able to finish this chapter tonight and wanted to get it to you all as soon as humanly possible. Since I'm still getting in the flow of school I truly don't know when I will be free to really sit down and write, and on top of all that I am getting a new laptop so I will have to find a way to transfer what I have written over. Don't worry I will try and keep you all in the loop as I make more progress. So here is chapter 7, and it is mush much longer than all my other chapters, so please, enjoy!**

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The next few classes went by in a breeze. None of the teachers seemed to bring up the email or anything so there was no need to stand out as the new student at all except during attendance. Someone from the group always seemed to be in one of my classes though. Whether it was Uriah, Marlene, Zeke, Shauna, Christina, or Will. At least one of them, if not more, were in my class and they always seemed to keep an eye on me. As if trying to figure out the new girl that made a dramatic entrance in Tori's art class. The one down side, or I guess up side, truth is I'm not really sure how to think of it, is that Tobias has been in ever class of mine. And in every class I can feel his stare, at one point I decided I was sick of acting like I didn't notice so I turned around and looked him right in the eyes, refusing to be the first to back down. But then he shifted his eyes down to the necklace and his eyes widened a little when they looked back up to my eyes. Once again I saw the hope in his eyes and I couldn't take it so I conceded and was the first to break eye contact. Lucky for me the bell rang singling the end of class and the beginning of lunch. So I decided to take this time to try and find Caleb.

I found him in the crowded hallway and called his name. When he turned around to see me relief flooded his face. He ran up and hugged me.

"Be-Tris, thank god. I was worried about you all day. I kept imaging the worse whenever the teacher's phone rang." I smiled at this, knowing I had a brother who truly worried and cared for me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Although my reunion with Tori was very emotional." I tried to laugh it off as if it wasn't such a big deal to me but Caleb knew how much she meant to me.

"I would hope so Tris, I mean she never left your side the entire time in the hospital and she's the one who gave you the courage to really fight back. She's an important figure in your life and if the reunion was anything less than emotional I would be worried." I was speechless, I didn't realize Caleb knew that or looked at Tori that way. Not knowing what to say I simply hugged him and whispered a faint 'Thank you' in his ear. "Now we should probably go our separate ways before lunch because walking in with a brother named Caleb might be a damper on your I'm not Beatrice life." And there is the brother I know and love, once a nerd always a nerd.

"Of course Caleb, how could I ever be so stupid. Thank you for being the intelligent sibling to always point out the facts." I answered sarcastically while dramatically rolling my eyes to show him I was joking.

"Yeah whatever _Tris_. You know I'm right anyways you just don't want to admit it." and with that I jokingly pushed his away and walked to the cafeteria.

I walked into the cafeteria and just looked around in awe. I never had the problem of who to sit with considering in elementary school you just sit with your class, so now I had to actually find people to sit with. I decided to just cross that bridge when I get there and go get food first. As I'm waiting in line I hear the people behind me and a debate over what's better, chocolate chip cookies or sugar cookies with sprinkles. I tried to tune it out because in all honestly, I found it to be the most idiotic debate to ever have, but hey, whatever floats their boat. I was somewhat successful in tuning them out until I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to realize it was Christina and Uriah having the argument. I internally cursed karma for doing this to me until Christina started talking.

"Hey I'm Christina and this idiot over here is my friend Uriah." She said while pointing her thumb back to a goofily smiling Uriah. "And if you didn't already hear us this idiot thinks chocolate chip cookies are better than sprinkle sugar cookies and we would like an outsiders input on this debate." I internally laughed. If only they realized that I was anything but an outsider to them but instead their best friend. "So what's your opinion?" I decided to drag out the thinking process as I paid for my food and when I had the chance to walk away I answered.

"Sorry Christina but I have to agree that chocolate chip cookies are my favorite." Christina gasped in mock hurt and Uriah started scream 'Told ya so' in her face.

I started to slowly walk away until Christina grabbed my arm.

"Wait, you're the new girl right? From Tori's class?"

"Yeah, that's me." I said with fake enthusiasm. Christina didn't seem to get the hint and started dragging me to her table with the rest of the gang.

"Well, I've already decided you are my new best friend even though I disagree with your cookie choices, and now I will introduce you to the rest of the gang so you can sit with us at lunch." She was literally dragging me to the table and dread filled me as the gang all looked back to see Christina dragging me over. 'Whelp, no getting out of it now.' I thought.

"Okay, everyone this is Tris, she's new. Tris this is Zeke, His girlfriend Shauna, her sister Lynn, Uriah, Zeke's brother, his girlfriend Marlene, my boyfriend Will, and Four." As she pointed to each of them all I wanted to say was, 'I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, and I know.' But according to them, I didn't know. So it was best to play along. Although it was nice to see that everyone's crushes finally grew into relationships for all of them. If only that could happen for me.

Anyway, I decided to just play along and pray that I was convincible enough.

"Hey, as Christina said I'm Tris, the new girl."

Zeke's the first to say something. "Wait, you're the girl from our art class this morning with Tori right? What was that all about?" Well, shit. Here goes nothing.

"Oh that? Yeah we are family friends and she has known me my whole life. Is basically an older sister to me but I moved around for my parents work and we haven't been able to get in contact for like five, six years. So it was a big shock to us both." Well, I guess it was bits of the truth, no matter how small those bits were.

"Oh, cool. We've just never seen Tori so emotional so it kinda took us all by surprise."

"Yeah, well I don't think you'll see her that emotional again." At least I hope not, the only other possibility for her to act like that is if something were to happen to me in class.

"So Tris," Marlene began. "Where are you from?"

"I moved here from California. My dad got offered a job and decided to take it. I should hopefully be here until graduation though." If I don't die first.

"Great! We are defiantly gonna become besties then!" Christina practically squealed. I guess I'm stuck hanging out with my old gang as a new person now.

The rest of lunch was basically the same. They asked questions, I lied. Although Tobias, or I guess I should get used to calling him Four now, still wouldn't stop sneaking glances at me. I'm starting to get worried that he'll break me before I decided to finally come out with the truth.

I don't know at what point this happened but I found myself agreeing to go out to the diner with them all after school. Apparently it's this new place they found that no one knows about, so they made it their new hang out place. So I texted Caleb telling him to leave without me considering they all carpooled to school today and they told me they would drop me off after. And with that the bell rang singling the end of lunch.

* * *

The rest of my classes were spent thinking of different ways these new friendships could go wrong. I mean, I relationship, no matter what kind, should never be built on lies and every single thing I'm telling the gang has been a lie in some form. It is now the end of the day and I'm making my way outside with Will, Christina and Uriah to meet the gang and go to the diner. As we walk out the front doors to the parking lot I see Zeke and Shauna making out, a sight I will unfortunately never be able to unsee, Marlene and Lynn talking, and four leaning against the hood of the car with his arms crossed. It seems he's in his own little world.

They don't seem to notice us until we are standing next to them telling them we are ready to go. As we are about to figure out the seating arrangements I hear someone yell for me from the doors.

"Tris! Tris!" I look back to see Tori waving me over. "We need to talk." I look back to the gang and they all nod in a way to tell me to go and that they will wait, so I make my way back up the steps to Tori.

"Yeah?"

"Listen Tris, I'm not gonna tell you what to do or how to live your life because quite frankly, I think you've had enough of that. But I am going to tell you to be careful. To you this might just be catching up with your old friends, but to them they are getting to know a girl they've never met before in their life. So just be careful and think this through, please? For me?" I sigh, how does Tori always know what the right thing to say is even if she knows I don't want to hear it.

"I will, but I have thought about the different ways this could all go wrong and to be honest, you know this group just as well as I do. Once they decide to be friends with someone there's no backing down. No matter what. So I'm kinda stuck."

"I know that, I guess what I'm trying to say is you have to think about the future here too, not just the present." I must give her a weird look because she decides to elaborate. "What I mean is you have to think about their feelings. They might not react the way you want them to when you finally decide to tell them the truth. Sure they might be happy to have their old best friend back, but you have to remember what they went through too. It might be a little hard for them to accept that their old best friend that mysteriously left seven years ago came back as "a different person" and became friends with them again as this new person and that she lied to them about having cancer this whole time. It'll be hard on them and difficult for them to process and I don't want you to get your hopes up, I want you to think clearly and know that this is a possibility." I didn't realize I had tears in my eyes until she reached over to wipe one away. Unable to speak I simply nodded my head and hugged her with silent tears streaming down my face.

"Okay, thanks Tori." She nodded and walked away. I looked over to see the whole group staring at me. Christina noticed my tears first and came running over to be devouring me in a bear hug.

"Oh my god! Tris! Are you okay? What happened?" by now the whole gang was surrounding me in a big group hug.

"Um, guys. Can't. breath." In that second they all let go and said some form of sorry. I chuckled slightly, it was nice to have friends who cared so much about you. "Thanks though. I'm fine by the way." They all gave me a disbelieving look but thankfully decided to just drop the subject. I was even more thankful to Uriah for noticing my discomfort and changing the subject.

"To the diner!" Uriah screamed puffing his chest out with one hand on his hip and the other straight up in the air like superman. And that's how he ran to the car with all of us trailing behind him laughing.

_~TIME SKIP- ONE WEEK LATER~_

I wake to my mother shaking my slightly.

"Beatrice, you have to wake up. School starts in fifteen minutes, Caleb just left." at that I shoot up straight in my bed. I start running around my room throwing on whatever clothes I can find that look somewhat decent together. My mother just sits on my bed laughing lightly at me. As I'm combing through my hair I speak up.

"Why didn't anybody wake me sooner?! Now not only did I miss any ride I had but I'm gonna be late! I'm gonna have to run."

"Oh, Beatrice I'm sure you won't be _that_ late. It's a ten minute walk and based on how fast you just got ready you'll make it there just in time. Plus, I don't think running would be in your best interest." I start tying up my sneakers and I hope out of my room.

"No mom. If I walk I make it there in time for the bell to ring but I will still be late. Plus the doctor said I was stable, so I am allowed to run and I will. I don't care what you say I shouldn't even have shortness of breath anymore so don't worry I'll be fine. Okay? Get it, got it, good. Love you!" And with that I ran out the house. As I was running I realized I needed some sort of back up plan so I pulled out my phone and called Christina.

"Hey Tris where are you? Class is about to start."

"No one felt the need to wake me up until five minutes ago. I am currently running to school. I need you to tell Tori for me because I might be like a minute late and I don't feel like playing twenty questions in front of the whole class when I finally decide to show up."

"Yeah sure thing. I'm walking into the classroom now and she's at her desk. I'll let her know. Just try and hurry okay?"

"Yeah, got it. Thanks so much. Bye!" As I hung up I pushed myself to go faster.

When I finally make it to class I burst through the doors running. As the door closes behind me I have to lean against it to catch my breath. I'm so focused on regaining my breathing that I don't even realize the entire class staring at me. Tori is the first to approach me.

"Tris, are you okay?"

"What? Yeah. Just a little out of breath from the run that's all." But we both know I was lying. I started to slide down the wall, still unable to catch my breath. I was so focused on getting air to my lungs that I didn't even notice the tears rolling down my cheeks.

"No, Tris. You're not okay. Maybe you should go to the nurse, I can call your brother to meet you and-"

"No!" I cut her off at the mention of Caleb. "You and I both know bringing him into this will make it all one hundred times worse. I'm fine! This is normal okay? Nothing is wrong and I don't need to go to the nurse or _anywhere else_ for that matter." She gave me a look like she didn't believe me but knew I was too stubborn to give in to the nurse, let alone the hospital.

"Fine," she sighed. "But at least just lay your head down on the desk or something to try and relax. I'm sure you'll catch your breath eventually." With that I walked over to my desk and sat down. The people from the gang who were in this class all gave me a look like they were waiting for an explanation but I just shrugged and put my head in my arms on the table. I decided to just close my eyes and try to block out the rest of the world for just five minutes to relax a little.

That's the last thing I remember.

* * *

"Tris, Tris. Wake up. Come on I let you sleep for a while now. It's lunch I think you should at least eat something." I opened my eyes to see Tori sitting next to me trying to shake me awake.

"It's lunch already?" She chuckled lightly.

"Yeah. You fell asleep first period in class but the room hasn't been used since so I just let you sleep. You know that wasn't normal this morning right? I really think you should go to the nurse or tell your doctor or someone Tris. I'm worried."

"The doctor said I was stable. So I can run. So I did. Anyone would be out of breath after running. I don't see the big deal."

"The big deal Tris, is that yes you were out of breath but it seemed to me that you couldn't catch your breath. Listen just go to lunch and eat something, and at least promise to mention this to your parents when you see them?" She gave me a hopeful look and I knew she was just as stubborn as me, so there was no getting out of this.

"Yes I'll tell my parents. Now I'm gonna go eat." And with that I walked down the hall to the cafeteria.

When I sat at the table it was silent. But that only lasted a second because all at once I was bombarded with questions. Ranging from what happened to if I was okay to why I would run to Uriah asking if I was gonna finish my fries. I put my hand in the air to silence them all and gave one answer to all of them.

"Yes I am okay. I was late to school so I decided to run here. I couldn't catch my breath so Tori let me relax in her classroom. And no Uriah, you cannot have my fries." That didn't seem to please them though because they just continued asking questions and ignoring my requests to leave it be.

Getting frustrated I slammed my hand on the table and rose from my seat.

"For God's sake just leave it be! I told you all I was fine and to drop it. So **drop it**!" Now that left them speechless. I decided that I just couldn't be around them anymore so I started to leave only to begin feeling a little dizzy. Four is the first one to notice and he gets up to help me as I hear Christina mention something about getting Tori or help or something around those lines. Four started to pull me back to the table telling me to just sit back down but I pushed him off yelling that I didn't need anybody's help. As I walked away again the dizziness became worse and I felt myself begin to sway.

It felt like slow motion as I began to fall to the ground. The voices around me were muffled and my vision began to darken. I could still see Christina come running in the cafeteria with Tori and as the darkness took over my sight the last thing I saw was a pair of dark blue eyes with worry in them and felt a pair of muscular arms catching me.

That's when everything went black.


	8. Chapter 8

**Please don't hate me. I didn't want to leave you all with a cliffhanger for so long so I decided to upload this as quickly as possible before I have to get back to my busy schedule. Honestly, this is really just a filler chapter so I apologize for the short length, especially after you got that nice long one last night. I promise you that the next few will not only be long but will be drama filled. Just trust me and be Patient!**

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I open my eyes to see a blinding white light above my head. As I gain most of my vision back I notice I'm in a hospital.

Of course.

The one place I hate the most has become the one place I am most. I think if I were to add together all the days I've spent in a hospital it would equal out to almost half my life so far. And truthfully, I find that extremely sad.

I'm pulled out of my thoughts by Dr. Murray walking into the room. When we make eye contact he just gives my a disapproving shake of the head.

"Beatrice-"

"First off Doc, it's Tris. I don't know how many times I have to tell you for you to finally understand. And second off, save the lecture and please just get to the point. I'm really not in the mood to be put down today." He just sighs as he looks down at the clipboard in his hands.

"Okay, Tris. I know that I said you were stable but you've only been stable for a short period of time. That being said, you're still not strong enough to be overexerting yourself as much as you have. It's not good for you. You have been here for a few hours now. While you were out we ran some tests to see if this has anything to do with the cancer or if it's just your bodies reaction to you doing more physical activity than you have been for the past few years. We won't know for sure until the results come in. now I'm going to leave you to get your rest and I really hope that you think about what I told you. It's for your own health." And with that he walks out leaving me to wish I just took my mother's advice to walk to school. Right when I'm about to close my eyes to rest I hear the door open again. Praying it's not another doctor or nurse I breath a sigh of relief when I see Tori walk in.

She comes over and sits on the edge of my bed like she used to.

"So I talked to your parents and Caleb. I told them they didn't have to leave work and school since you were still out, and that I would call them when you woke up. But I also know you and know you need some time to yourself before they come to scold you, so I will give you an hour or so before I call them. Okay?" I nod, extremely thankful to have someone like Tori who understands that sometimes I just need my space. "Unfortunately, that space will be hard to have considering the entire gang is here in the waiting room wanting to see you." My eyes widen in panic and I start to stutter.

"No Tori they can't come in here. They'll find out about me and my cancer! You can't let them find out! You can't! Please!" I begged Tori while on the verge of tears. She let out a sigh and combed her fingers through her hair.

"What if I talk to Dr. Murray and ask him to keep everything vague when talking to you? Because you said it yourself Tris. When they all want something none of them give up. They're worried about you and they will not leave until they get to see you. Do we have a deal?"

"Way to use my own words against me. Fine, send them in." Tori smirked at me and go up to leave, I couldn't help but let out a light laugh at her. She knows me so well that it's scary at points.

It seems as though Tori was right about them being worried. Not even a minute after she left they all came sprinting into my room screaming my name. it was like lunch all over again, each of them asking twenty questions a mile a minute at the same time. Deciding to handle this similarly to lunch and decided to just yell.

"Shut up! All of you! If I didn't answer you when you acted like this during lunch why would in now? Plus look how that turned out, if I were you all I would listen to the requests of the girl in the hospital bed. Okay?" I asked will frustration tracing in my tone.

"Yes ma'am." They all answered simultaneously

. I couldn't stop the satisfying smile that spread across my face at their response. Right as I open my mouth to try and answer their questions Dr. Murray comes into my room with an apologetic looking Tori behind him. The gang seemed to take this as a sign to all back away from my bed and to give the doctor space. But you could still notice the hint of curiosity in each of their eyes. The nerves settled in when I realized that this might be the end of everything and I took a deep breath preparing for the reactions of them all.

"Well, _Tris_." Dr. Murray made eye contact with me and gave a subtle wink as if to tell me not to worry. I heaved a sigh of relief and I relaxed back into my bed.

"What's the verdict Doc?" I asked with a playful tone and a smile etched on my face. I looked behind him to see the same reaction on Tori's face as well.

"Well Tris. You can leave whenever you feel like it. The results from the tests won't come in for about a week so I will see you then and we will find out and discuss what exactly happened, okay?"

"Sure thing Doc. See ya in a week." As I was about to get up I realized I was still in my hospital gown. I turned to Christina knowing she would be the only one with extra clothes in the gang. "Hey Chris? Do you have any clothes I can borrow? I didn't realize I was still wearing this." Chris just smiles and pulls out a plastic bag from the floor next to her.

"You know me too well Tris. Here you go we will all be waiting for you outside and give you some privacy to change. See you in a few." With that the entire gang and Tori left, leaving just me and Dr. Murray.

"Don't worry about getting an appointment, you already have one next week for your monthly check up so we will just talk about it during that appointment. Okay?"

"Yes sir." I said fake saluting him. He laughed lightly and started to walk out. But right as he was about to close the door he turn back to me and said.

"Tris, just please remember what I told you about overexerting yourself. You're finally getting healthy again, as much as you might be my favorite patient I really don't want to see you in here as much as you have been."

"I will Doc." Right before he was out of earshot I yelled after him. "And don't think I'll ever let that favorite patient comment go. I will constantly remind you!" he just kept walking away but I could tell he heard me because he was laughing as he gave me a thumbs up from behind.

I quickly get changed and walk out to the waiting room where all my friends are joking around waiting for me. As we all walk out to the cars I realize I haven't really eaten at all today.

"Hey guys. Do you wanna go get some food I skipped breakfast when I woke up late then passed out during lunch. So I really didn't eat much and I just realized how starving I am." Everyone looked at each other and nodded in agreement. I was enjoying the comfortable silence between us as we exited the hospital until Uriah decided to ruin it as usual with his typical "To the diner!" Superman act. But in all honesty, it was nice to feel like a carefree teenager for once. This is what I've been missing all those years getting home schooled and in the hospital. I missed the simplicity of a carefree teenage friendship.

I could really get used to this. Let's just hope nothing decides to ruin it this time.

Although with my luck who am I kidding, something's bound to happen.

And soon.


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry once again for the along wait. i really hope you all enjoy this. Once again a big thanks to guest 1234321 for the idea i hope i did it justice! Like usual, i don't own ****anything, just my ideas!**

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_**TRIS POV**_

It's been a week since my little episode and unexpected hospital visit. I was currently on my way to meet Dr. Murray with my parents for my monthly appointment. As much as I would like to say I hope all is well, I simply can't.

For once I actually listened to the doctor's requests to take it easy. Even though I found it extremely hard not to with my parents and Caleb watching over me at home, and Tori and Caleb watching over me at school. Yet I still had this uneasy feeling in the pit of me stomach and I didn't like it one bit.

As we sat in Dr. Murray's office waiting the nerves settled in and I found myself fidgeting constantly and repeatedly tapping my foot in anticipation. When Dr. Murray came in he had an unreadable expression on his face that didn't help ease my nerves.

"Well Mr. and Mrs. Prior, Tris. The tests from last week came in, but the tests did not show a single result. Therefore, we would like to request that you stay over night so we can run some addition tests." Of course, I knew there had to be a catch. My mom was the first to speak.

"And what will the additional tests show?"

"Well, we hope that they will allow us to eliminate some of the theories as to what happened and give us a better understanding. Hopefully we will be able to eliminate enough to give us a solid conclusion and we will know how to go about treating you if necessary at all." Great, just what I wanted, another night spent in the hospital. I let out a frustrated sigh and closed my eyes putting my head in my hands. "I know this is not idle Tris but it is for you own benefit. If there is even the slightest chance of a reoccurrence we want to be able to catch it as early on as possible to be able to tackle the problem before it's on full effect."

"I know that Doc I just really don't wanna spend another night here. Nothing personally to you or the staff but it's really not my kind of atmosphere." Dr. Murray chuckled softly.

"It's nobody's atmosphere Tris and trust e I take no offense at all. Personally I don't know what I would do if I had to live here for one night let alone longer. I really look up to you for that, you put up with a lot Tris and I find that extremely brave and inspiring.

And with that I zoned out while my parents continued asking their fifty questions and signing their multiple papers. After they finally finished the meeting Dr. Murray led me to my room and told me they would be in soon to get me prepped for the tests.

* * *

_**TOBIAS POV**_

I am currently at Zeke's house trying to prolong going home for as long as possible. It's starting to get pretty late and Zeke offered me to stay the night but I knew what would happen if Marcus caught me sneaking into the house in the morning, it would be worse than getting caught coming home late. I turned him down because not only did I not want to get a worse beating, but I wasn't so sure how much longer I could be tormented by Zeke about Tris.

_Few Hours Earlier_

"Dude what's up with you and Tris?" Zeke asked while still focusing on the video game in front of him. Luckily he wasn't able to see my shocked reaction and I was able to turn my expression emotionless before he paused the game and turned to look at me, an expecting look on his face. It was then that I realized I never answered him.

"I don't know what you are talking about." I rubbed the back of my neck nervously and I could tell that he didn't believe me.

"Oh, really? How about I fill you in then?" I groaned, he was not going to let this go. "You stare at her like all the time. I mean every time she isn't paying attention I see you stealing glances at her. And when you're around her you're different. I don't know how exactly and most people probably don't notice it but I'm your best friend dude, I can tell. This girl is changing you whether you know it or not." And with that he unpaused the game and continued playing as if we didn't even stop to have that conversation.

_Present_

I know Zeke isn't one to really talk about emotions much, but after his little monologue earlier I would rather not stick around to find out.

As I looked at the clock I decided it was a safe time to go. Not too late where I would barely get any sleep before Marcus wakes me and forces me into more chores, but also late enough where he should either be asleep or passed out drunk on the couch.

* * *

As I walked into the door I noticed that the lights were on. Not a good sign. As I closed the door behind me I felt thrash of pain as the belt came in contact with my back.

"You're late you worthless piece of shit." That's the only thing he said to me as he continued to bring his belt down onto my back. I counted as he continued. 5,6,7,8…18,19,20. But he continued past twenty. In all these years that Marcus has been whipping me he has never gone past twenty lashes. He says he likes that amount because it causes the maximal amount of pain while still leaving me able to function enough to clean up the mess left by my blood. But for some reason tonight he continued, and as he passed 40 I began to lose count, the pain becoming too unbearable. I don't even know when he stopped because at some point I did something I have never done during a beating. I went unconscious.

* * *

When I wake up I can tell it's still late, the sky is basically black and there is no noise except for the crickets outside the window. The lights in the house are all turned off and I noticed Marcus' car keys are gone. For a moment I almost forgot about the beating until I went to stand up and collapsed on the floor in agonizing pain. I began to get light headed and realized it was from the blood loss as I looked at the blood pooled around me. I felt myself losing conciseness again and did the only thing I knew that would help. I called one of the only people in my life that knew about my father, Tori.

She found out about a year ago when one of my wounds reopened in school and started to bleed. Luckily she was the only one that noticed and since she volunteered in the hospital she's been helping me ever since.

The phone kept ringing and I could only prey that she would pick up before I passed out again. When she finally answers I decided to just get straight to the point.

"Tori." I could hear her gasp and become more alert at the sound of my weak voice on the other line.

"Four? What happened, are you okay, do you need help?"

"It's never been this bad Tori. I can't move. Help. Please." I could hear her running out of her house and starting her car through the phone.

"I coming now Four but I need you to stay awake and on the phone with me can you do that?"

"I don't think I can. Please, just hurr-"

That's when everything went black again.

* * *

I wake up to bright white lights and some sort of beeping sound. I guess Tori was able to get me to the hospital. Every move I make sends agonizing pain throughout my entire body and I cant help but let out a painful scream. Doctors come rushing in checking on me and giving me more pain meds before telling me what happened.

My doctors say that they have Marcus in custody after finding him at a bar with my blood on his hands, literally, and they are all willing to testify against him to confirm my wounds and scars are proof of years of physical abuse. Tori was able to talk to the police and since it is evident I have been taking care of myself for how many years now that if I chose to I am allowed to stay at my house alone. They say I am in stable condition after many hours of working on me but they want me to stay in the hospital for a few days to watch over me and make sure nothing goes wrong. Since I have so many scars that went untreated properly they say they would feel better if they got to watch over me and that they would rather be safe than sorry.

I reluctantly agree as my eyelids begin to feel heavier. The doctors take notice and tell me to get some sleep as they move me to a more permanent room.

* * *

When I wake up again I realize that I am in my new room that I will be stuck in for the next few days. As I look around I take notice to my roommate. I can barely make out her face since I'm still a little groggy from sleep but she looks extremely familiar. As I rub the sleep out of my eyes I finally notice who it is.

It's Tris!

I remember the doctor telling her about seeing her about her tests when we were visiting her last week but I didn't realize she would be staying overnight. And in the same room as me. When I hear voice approaching from outside I decide it's in my best interest to just fake sleep for now. Plus, I'm really not in the mood for answering questions. I hear as what sounds like a doctor and a women enter the room and they stay in Tris' side. I feel bad eavesdropping but it's too late to reveal myself now so I just try not to listen so intently. But that becomes nearly impossible with what I hear next.

"She looks so peaceful when she's asleep. Almost like nothing is wrong and she is just a normal teenage girl. Of all the people why her Doctor? Why my Beatrice?" As the women says this I can hear her voice begin to crack and can tell she is on the verge of tears. But all I can concentrate on is that she called her Beatrice. I mean I realized that Tris must be a nickname but knowing that's her full name it makes me more intrigued to find out the truth about her.

Little did I know I would find out the truth just moments after when the doctor replies

"I know you find this unfair but hopefully these tests will give us more answers. For now I suggest you just take a breath and try to relax. I come in a little later to check on her, okay Mrs. Prior?"

That's when it all clicks for me. Beatrice, Mrs. Prior, I knew she looked familiar from day one that's why I couldn't take my eyes off her, and her necklace is what threw me over the edge. It was the same one I wore around my neck everyday. I laid there in complete and utter shock.

Tris was Beatrice Prior.

* * *

_**TRIS POV**_

I wake up with the same initial thoughts as when I woke up in the hospital a week ago, only now I knew why I was here. I'm still a little foggy but eventually gain enough focus to ask my mom to get the doctor. She just nodded her head and let go of my hand. As she walked out of my room I continued to rub the sleep out of my eyes. I don't know if it's that there is a chance my cancer might be back, or if it's just being back in the hospital knowing I have to stay a few nights, but I feel extremely irritable and don't feel like putting up with my doctor's scolding and my mother's look of pity.

I soon find out that I have extremely little patience today as well because the second I hear the word Beatrice come out of both my mother and my doctor's mouths I lose it.

"What have I told you about calling me Beatrice? My name is Tris. Tris! It's four measly letters, even an idiot would be able to comprehend that!" The shock at my outburst is evident on both their faces but at the moment I could care less. So I do what I do best in these situations, I continue yelling at them. "I have been asking to go by Tris for seven years now. What don't you understand when I say that Beatrice is gone, okay?! Your little, innocent Bumble Bea is no longer here. I am Tris now. Strong Tris. Brave Tris. Warrior Tris. So please just get that through your heads and we can move on, okay?" I didn't realize how emotional I was getting until I noticed the tears beginning to blur my vision. But unlike my mother, I didn't let them fall. That would defeat the strong image I just yelled at them for.

After seeing both my doctor and mother speechless I began to feel the guilt creep into the pit of my stomach. So I just shook my head to get rid of all these crazy, emotional thoughts and looked at my mother with apologetic eyes and sighed.

"I'm sorry. I guess everything is just finally catching up to me now and I'm finding it hard to keep all my emotions in check lately."

"It's okay Tris. I would expect nothing else. How about me and your mother give you some time to rest and get your thoughts in check before we start to talk more about everything. Is that good with you?" Dr. Murray smiled shyly at me. That's what I liked about him, he never gave me a look of pity or anything when I had an outburst. He just stayed calm and collected and always seemed to know what to do in that moment to make everybody happy. Or at least content.

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Thanks Doc." I smiled at him as I nodded my head in agreement. While they started to leave I replayed what I had said in my head. _'I am Tris now. Strong Tris. Brave Tris. Warrior Tris.' _As if by instinct my hand went up to my neck. Usually in times like this I like to hold onto the necklace Tobias got me to not only remind me why I was doing all this but to give me strength. Yet, when my hand went to my neck there was nothing there. I stopped my mother before she could completely close the door to my room.

"Hey mom?" She popped her head back in the door and looked at me waiting to hear what I had to say. "Do you know where my necklace is? You know the puzzle piece one?" She slowly walked over to me and sat on the edge of my bed lightly taking my hand in both of hers.

"Well for the tests we had to take off all access accessories, and when the doctors noticed you didn't take the necklace off they had to. They told me after they let me back in here to see you, they-" I cut her off by pulling my hand from her grasp.

"Well do you know where it is?" I asked with a little more annoyance noticeable in my voice than I originally meant. She sighed and refused to look me in the eyes.

"I'm not sure. They apparently gave it to a nurse to hold onto and give to me but no nurse ever came to me. I'm sure they'll find it at some point and when they do they will give it to Dr. Murray and-" I cut her off again, but this time I didn't control my emotions. I found myself yelling and crying without oven realizing it.

"OUT! GET. OUT. You know I never take that necklace off! You know what that necklace means to me! It has been around my neck for the past seven years, through every doctors appointment, through every hospital visit, or extending stay. Every night I cried myself to sleep I held on to that necklace! Every time I doubted myself I had that necklace. Every time needed reminded, that necklace! Every time I need reassurance without pity, necklace! That necklace is what reminded me why I was fighting in the first place. That necklace was a reminder of all those I love. That necklace is what has given me my strength for the past seven years. And if you're telling me that now, when I probably needed it the most you lose it then I don't want to talk to you anymore. So please, just get out." My voice only got louder with each sentence I said and as I got louder the tears fell faster. By the end I was screaming at the top of my lung, sobbing uncontrollably while pointing at the door for my mom to leave. Thankfully she didn't say a word and she just walked out shutting the door behind her.

After I hear to door shut I sigh a breath a relief. Finally being alone to sort through all the emotions I went through in the past fifteen minutes. After I finally was able to calm down I was startled out of my thoughts by a voice. A voice I didn't think I would hear, not here. And as I heard what he said I couldn't stop the surprised gasp that escaped my mouth.

"Glad to know you still wear it, because I never took mine off either. Now, here's the question Bea. Are you ready to put the pieces together again?"


	10. Chapter 10

**So many of you wanted the first half now so here it is! I plan to write the second half later tonight and posting it right after i finish!**

* * *

_**TRIS POV**_

_ I looked down at the ground in shame. I broke my best friend's heart, how could I live with myself after this? He put his finger under my chin to lift my head up for our eyes to meet._

_ "I don't know when but I do know that we will see each other again Bea. And when we do I will be waiting to put these pieces together again."_

* * *

I couldn't stop the gasp from escaping my mouth at the sound of his voice. But what brought the tears to my eyes wasn't that he was here, or that he realized who I was, it was what he said. It was that he remembered his promise all these years later. That he was still willing to keep that promise even after learning how I lied.

When I finally gain enough courage to look over at him I notice that I'm not the only one with tears in my eyes, he also is using all his will power to keep them from spilling over.

"I think I deserve an explanation Bea. Or should I say Tris? You've been here all this time, you've sat next to me, talked to me, you knew it was me and yet you still lied. Why?! I deserve to know what you let me think I was insane since you've been back." He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before continuing. "I was broken when you left, I felt like I had nothing to live for anymore. I barely talked I closed myself off. Most of all I never let a single person call me by my name, because if they did it would bring me to tears reminding me of you. Then seven years later someone who looks exactly like you comes walking into my art class. You may have changed a little Bea, but you really thought I wouldn't recognize you the second I looked into your eyes. Not to mention the fact that you still had the necklace on. I thought I was going insane! I almost started to avoid you just to avoid the pain seeing you brought me! So I deserve a reason! I deserve to know why!" His voice started rising as he kept asking me why and with each octave it got higher the more pain and guilt it brought me. I didn't realize what sparing my feelings would do to him.

I broke my best friend's heart, again.

At that thought I can't control it anymore. The sobs take me over and I don't even try to contain them anymore, I need to let my emotions out, I need to relieve myself of this pain, this guilt, once and for all.

In an attempt to comfort as best he could, Tobias reaches across our beds and takes my hand in his while still holding eye contact. When his hand grabs mine the sparks I felt all those years ago reappear and I couldn't be more thankful for anything. After all that's happened, at least that remained the same. I can't bare to look him in the eyes when I tell him so I keep my eyes locked on out entangled hands and take a deep breath.

"I can't tell you. I'm sorry, I'm only doing this to protect you-"

"Bullshit! I knew you've been lying since day one! All those seven years ago."

I wasn't sure if he remembered exactly what happened, but I guess he did. He squeezes my hand causing me to look him in the eyes.

"This all started on that day when you ran out of breath on the run home from school. Ever since then you started lying. Whether about how you had a panic attack, why you were going on a "sudden vacation" or why you were suddenly moving without planning on telling any of us. I have been worried about you since that day; even though you weren't here I still worried Bea. Because I never forgot about you. So please, just tell me why?"

"I can't okay! I just can't! You won't understand!" I haven't realized I started yelling until I saw the look of shock cross his face. The shock quickly vanished when he started to yell back.

"Then help me understand Bea! Help me! I've waited seven years to see you again and I find out that you never planned on actually revealing yourself to me. How long Tris?! How long did you plan to stay hidden?!"

"However long was necessary." I answer just above a whisper, hoping he wouldn't ask questions. But obviously with my luck lately he did.

"What does that even mean? Do you even care at all? Because on one hand you still wear the necklace, but on the other hand you lied to all your friends about being back. Do you even feel guiltily? I mean knowing how much we all missed you and wanted you back, yet here you were, hidden in plain sight not planning to tell us the truth. Did-" I can't take it anymore. I abruptly sit up in my bed and start screaming on the top of my lungs all while keeping eye contact with him.

"That's why I didn't tell you guys! I couldn't handle another goodbye! I love you all too much to put you through that pain again; I can't do that to you! I just can't!" Tobias repeats my exact actions. Sitting up in bed and screaming back at me.

"Why would we have to say goodbye again? If you're here to stay why would you have to say goodbye?" I can't do this anymore, there's no way out of this and it's not like either of us can just get up and walk out. I sigh, and close my eyes. I don't open them again until I feel Tobias grab both my hands in his, and I look into his eyes to see that behind the tears streaming down my face he has a pleading expression on. I ignore the tears currently streaming down my face as well and answer him with the one sentence I hoped I would never have to tell him, of all people.

"Because Toby. I have cancer."

* * *

**I plan to make the next chapter this whole situation but in Tobias' POV. So i really hope you enjoyed this and i will post the rest later!**


	11. Chapter 11

**SO i realize this is a week late, but I have been under a lot of stress lately. I know, excuses, excuses. I would apologize but I don't deserve your forgiveness so I will just cut to the chase and let you read the update. So here is the long awaited Tobias POV chapter!**

* * *

TOBIAS POV

"_I know you find this unfair but hopefully these tests will give us more answers. For now I suggest you just take a breath and try to relax. I come in a little later to check on her, okay Mrs. Prior?"_

_ That's when it all clicks for me. Beatrice, Mrs. Prior, I knew she looked familiar from day one that's why I couldn't take my eyes off her, and her necklace is what threw me over the edge. It was the same one I wore around my neck everyday. I laid there in complete and utter shock._

_ Tris was Beatrice Prior._

* * *

I couldn't breath. How could she have been in front of me this whole time. I knew there was something about Tris. From the moment my eyes connected with hers I knew there was something familiar. Bea's changed, obviously, but she could never hide those eyes that I love to stare into from me, and the necklace. I wear mine under my shirt so she could never see it but I thought I saw her wearing the same exact one around her neck, I guess now I knew I was right. I want to be happy, ecstatic even, I want to jump out of my bed and pick her up in a huge bear hug right now. But something's holding me back. Something's telling my gut not to do it. And it's the fact that she lied.

I knew she lied all those years ago. It was obvious by her reaction that she did not have a panic attack and she was not going on a surprise vacation. And when she wanted to move without telling anyone, I'm just glad I went to her when I did otherwise I wouldn't have even get to say bye, or give her the necklace. I don't know why she was lying then, but I'm determined to find out. What could be so bad that she would lie not only then, but now, seven years later, when we could all finally be together again?

She's still asleep, and I take this moment to take in her features. Same gorgeous eyes, same beautiful blonde hair, even if it is remarkably shorter now. And now that I get a good look at her I am able to notice just how little she's changed. I was just too caught up in a depressed state of loss that I didn't even realize who she was.

I hear her mom come back in and turn my head to the other side again, trying to go unnoticed for as long as possible. A few minutes later I hear her start to wake up and her mom go get the doctor. What came out of her mouth next utterly shocked me. I don't know what the big deal is but obviously it means something to her.

"What have I told you about calling me Beatrice? My name is Tris. Tris! It's four measly letters, even an idiot would be able to comprehend that!" The shock at my outburst is evident on both their faces but at the moment I could care less. So I do what I do best in these situations, I continue yelling at them. "I have been asking to go by Tris for seven years now. What don't you understand when I say that Beatrice is gone, okay?! Your little, innocent Bumble Bea is no longer here. I am Tris now. Strong Tris. Brave Tris. Warrior Tris. So please just get that through your heads and we can move on, okay?" You could tell she was about to cry but knowing her, and after that speech, she was not going to let that happen. I could tell by the awkward silence to fill the room after that she immediately felt guilty for her little meltdown because she decoded to apologize. "I'm sorry. I guess everything is just finally catching up to me now and I'm finding it hard to keep all my emotions in check lately." But what I wanna know is what the big deal is. What's so bad that it could make her act like that and put her in the hospital again when she was here no more than a week ago.

"It's okay Tris. I would expect nothing else. How about me and your mother give you some time to rest and get your thoughts in check before we start to talk more about everything. Is that good with you?" I'm pretty sure that's the same doctor she had when she came to the hospital last week. And if he knows her so well then whatever put her here has to be serious right? I mean what else would land her in the hospital twice in two weeks with a doctor she is obviously a reoccurring patient of.

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Thanks Doc." I could hear her moving her hands somewhere and searching for something. What, I had no clue but I had a feeling I was about to find out, and it wasn't going to be pretty. "Hey mom? Do you know where my necklace is? You know the puzzle piece one?"

"Well for the tests we had to take off all access accessories, and when the doctors noticed you didn't take the necklace off they had to. They told me after they let me back in here to see you, they-" She cut her off before she even got the chance to finish explaining.

"Well do you know where it is?" Part of me filled with joy when I could tell just how annoyed she was about not having the necklace on her. I mean, I did feel a little bad that her mom was getting the blunt of her anger even though she did nothing wrong, but I couldn't stop the butterflies form entering my stomach.

"I'm not sure. They apparently gave it to a nurse to hold onto and give to me but no nurse ever came to me. I'm sure they'll find it at some point and when they do they will give it to Dr. Murray and-" Uh oh. This was not going to be good.

"OUT! GET. OUT. You know I never take that necklace off! You know what that necklace means to me! It has been around my neck for the past seven years, through every doctors appointment, through every hospital visit, or extending stay. Every night I cried myself to sleep I held on to that necklace! Every time I doubted myself I had that necklace. Every time needed reminded, that necklace! Every time I need reassurance without pity, necklace! That necklace is what reminded me why I was fighting in the first place. That necklace was a reminder of all those I love. That necklace is what has given me my strength for the past seven years. And if you're telling me that now, when I probably needed it the most you lose it then I don't want to talk to you anymore. So please, just get out." She was screaming at the top of her lungs, and I could hear the tears forming and falling from her eyes. My heart broke for her and I knew that as her mom left it was now or never. So I turned my head to face her and said the one thing I've been waiting to say for seven years now.

"Glad to know you still wear it, because I never took mine off either. Now, here's the question Bea. Are you ready to put the pieces together again?" After the words escaped my mouth she gasped. I couldn't tell if that was a good or bad thing. But I was hoping that saying what I did would show her that I remember my promise from all those years ago and I could only hope she did too.

I don't know what came over me but as she turned to look at me I felt tears begin to form in my eyes. I've looked at her before but this is the first time I am looking at her, at Bea, and I can't control my emotions anymore. I use all my will power to keep them from spilling because I need an explanation and I know that once I let them lose I won't get any answers. So I decide that waiting seven years is enough, I want answers and I'm determined to get them.

"I think I deserve an explanation Bea. Or should I say Tris? You've been here all this time, you've sat next to me, talked to me, you knew it was me and yet you still lied. Why?! I deserve to know what you let me think I was insane since you've been back." I have to close my eyes and take a deep breath to control my emotions right now. "I was broken when you left, I felt like I had nothing to live for anymore. I barely talked I closed myself off. Most of all I never let a single person call me by my name, because if they did it would bring me to tears reminding me of you. Then seven years later someone who looks exactly like you comes walking into my art class. You may have changed a little Bea, but you really thought I wouldn't recognize you the second I looked into your eyes. Not to mention the fact that you still had the necklace on. I thought I was going insane! I almost started to avoid you just to avoid the pain seeing you brought me! So I deserve a reason! I deserve to know why!" I didn't even realize I was yelling until she started crying. The sobs were uncontrollable and I wanted so badly to wrap her in my arms and tell her it was okay. In an attempt to comfort her in some way I decide to reach my hand across the gap between our beds and grab her hand. All without breaking our eye contact. as I entangle our hands that familiar spark shoots up my arm and through my entire body. While I look in her eyes she looks down at our hands and takes a shaky breath.

"I can't tell you. I'm sorry, I'm only doing this to protect you-" Anger slowly bubbles up inside of me when I hear this.

"Bullshit! I knew you've been lying since day one! All those seven years ago." She propably didn't expect me to remember what happened, but I remember every single detail. I squeeze her hand in an attempt to get her to look at me, and luckily it works. So I decide to continue. "This all started on that day when you ran out of breath on the run home from school. Ever since then you started lying. Whether about how you had a panic attack, why you were going on a "sudden vacation" or why you were suddenly moving without planning on telling any of us. I have been worried about you since that day; even though you weren't here I still worried Bea. Because I never forgot about you. So please, just tell me why?"

"I can't okay! I just can't! You won't understand!" She started yelling at I couldn't stop the look of shock that must've shown on my face. Of all things I didn't expect her to yell at me as well as continue to keep secrets. My frustration gets the better of me and I start to yell back.

"Then help me understand Bea! Help me! I've waited seven years to see you again and I find out that you never planned on actually revealing yourself to me. How long Tris?! How long did you plan to stay hidden?!"

"However long was necessary." It was barely auditable. basically a whisper. I don't think she planned for me to hear it, but I did.

"What does that even mean? Do you even care at all? Because on one hand you still wear the necklace, but on the other hand you lied to all your friends about being back. Do you even feel guiltily? I mean knowing how much we all missed you and wanted you back, yet here you were, hidden in plain sight not planning to tell us the truth. Did-" She surprises m by sitting up in bed abruptly, and screaming at the top of her lungs. At least she was keeping eye contact this time.

"That's why I didn't tell you guys! I couldn't handle another goodbye! I love you all too much to put you through that pain again; I can't do that to you! I just can't!" I copy her previous actions, along with the screaming.

"Why would we have to say goodbye again? If you're here to stay why would you have to say goodbye?" I can tell she is deep in thought, obviously conflicted about something. When she closes her eyes and takes another deep breath I decide to take both her hands in mine to try and tell her I'm here for her without using my words. I don't know when I started crying but I suddenly feel the tears streaming down my face, and when she finally opens her eyes to look into mine her emotions reflect my own.

But hat she said next I was not expecting. What she said broke my heart into a million little pieces.

"Because Toby. I have cancer."

I felt my breath get caught in my throat. It took a few seconds to finally process what she said, and I had no clue how to react. I was in such a state f shock o couldn't move. Bea's cries are what brought me out of my state of shock and I didn't care how painful it was, I go tout of my bed sat next to her and pulled her into a long awaited hug. As she cried into my chest I knew at that moment, I would do whatever it took to protect her.

I was not letting her out of my sight, out of my life.

Not again.


	12. Chapter 12

**So yeah, it's been a while hasn't it? I know you all hate me but college work and midterms tend to be more important than writing more chapters. Contrary to what i try to tell myself. I have finally been able to sit down and write this chapter. I felt bad for making you all wait for so long so this chapter sucks and is really only a filler-type chapter. I haven't written more of this considering I'm still trying to figure out the next few chapters. I will try to write but I don't want to give you all a time frame and not stick to it, so instead I'm going to tell you that within the next two weeks I should have something up. Sorry again! I hope you enjoy.**

* * *

**_TRIS POV_**

I don't know what I was expecting. But this, this certainly was not it. I could see the state of shock he was in after the words came out of my mouth and I know it wasn't his fault, but I couldn't stop the cries from escaping me at his reaction. But the second he snapped out of his daze I did not see a single trace of pity. And I was thankful. But once again, I did not expect him to get out of his bed and pull me into an embrace.

Once I was in his familiar embrace I couldn't hold it back anymore. All the guilt, all the anger, all the sadness from the past seven years came barreling back and I just cried into his chest. He didn't try to calm me down or talk to me, he knew me better than that. So he just sat with me in his arms as I cried and he lightly stroked my hair; a familiar gesture that does more comforting for me than he will ever realize.

I don't know how long we stay like that. Maybe a few minutes, maybe a few hours, but as my cries slowly come to a stop, neither one of us seem to want to move. Both, obviously, content with staying in each other's arms like we used to all those years ago. You truly don't know what you have till it's gone; and this, this right here, was all I needed in these past seven years.

"I guess you want to know the truth now?" I asked him without looking in his eyes.

"If you don't mind, yeah. I care about you Bea, and I want to be here for you." I took a deep breath. He cared about me. Maybe telling him the whole story wouldn't be as bad as I've made it out to be.

"Well, I guess I should start from the beginning." I felt him tighten his grip on me, a way of silently telling me he is supporting me. "That first day, when we were ten, after you brought me back home my parents took me to the emergency room. They ran multiple tests, but nothing came back and the doctors were confused as to why nothing made any sense. So as a last resort for answers they ran a blood test. That's when it came back that I had leukemia. I found out that night at exactly 9:27. I know that because as my parents cried and asked continuous questions I just stared at the clock. Counting down each second, each minute, each hour, thinking that I could possibly be my last."

"But you're still here Bea, remember that." Tobias whispered in my ear, tightening his grip on me again.

"That night, I heard my mom's sobs, my dad's attempts to comfort her, and Caleb's look of pity. That's where I realized I _hate _pity. And I thought that the only way to stay away from it was to lie. When I told you guys that I was going on a surprise vacation for god knows how long, I was really going to be in the hospital for my first chemo treatment. I felt bad but all I had to say was that I had a panic attack from excessive stress and my parents thought it was a good idea to take a surprise vacation to get away from it all. I mean they did all believe me obviously, well all of them but you. When you found me sitting by that tree it was because I had to stop since I couldn't see from the tears clouding my vision. I knew you didn't believe me I saw it in your eyes the second the excuse came out of my mouth, I just couldn't bring myself to tell you. You're the one I would've had the hardest time telling. My heart nearly broke in two when you whispered about trusting you with my life, because the truth was that I did trust you with my life already, I was just too much of a coward to tell you. And then you-"

"Kissed you on the cheek." I looked up at him confused. "Yeah, I remember that. I could never forget that." I smiled and laid my head back down on his shoulder. "And you're not a coward Bea. You were ten and put in a life changing situation that most adults can't handle properly, let alone a kid." With that he started playing with my hair, calming me down, as I continued.

"I was in the hospital for around two weeks. And the first thing I could tell you about those two weeks is that the first thing I learned is how much I hate hospitals." I felt him chuckling against me, and that made me smile. "During that first hospital visit is when I met Tori. She actually gave me the name Tris. She said Beatrice sounded too old; Tris was the name of a warrior, a fighter, and a strong, young girl. The name stuck, and she even bought me my first sketchbook. She said I was a natural artist, but in reality art was my distraction from my life in the hospital, a way to express all the emotions I was holding in. that first visit was when I found out I had acute myeloid leukemia, or AML. I have a seventy percent chance of remission but during chemo I have to stay in the hospital for a month. Even though my doctor, Dr. Murray, was an expert with this type of cancer, he suggested moving me to their sister hospital in California because it was a pediatric hospital. So I would feel more comfortable during my extended visits. I begged with them to stay, but my parents agreed right away, saying at least I would be with other kids. Being my stubborn self, I refused to talk or even look at anyone except Tori. So she stayed that last night with me. I cried for hours. I didn't want to leave my home, my friends, but most of all I didn't want to leave you. When saying goodbye Tori told me something I still remember to this day. She said, 'I will see you again Tris. I don't know where and I don't know when. But I do know hat I will see you again and you will be a strong, healthy, and beautiful girl who will love her life. I know you doubt yourself but I have enough hope for the both of us. I know you will make it out of this and you can tell me I was right when I see you again.' And when I asked how she could be so sure she told me, 'Because, Tris, you are a warrior. Now go and be brave.' That's when I decided that I wasn't going to fight this for myself but I was gonna fight it for those I loved. The next day was when you found me before we left, and when you gave me the necklace." Tobias looked down at me.

"I remember that day as well. The worst day of my life. You were- are- my best friend Bea, and I couldn't imagine life without seeing you every day, without hearing your voice or laugh, or seeing you smile. I cried that entire night, I didn't talk to anyone for at least a week. I was heartbroken, and I would just lay on my bed holding the necklace close to my heart hoping you were doing the same." I looked him in the eyes as I responded.

"I was." That's when a lone tear rolled down my cheek, and before I got a chance to myself, Tobias reached up and wiped it away with his thumb. Smiling and looking me in my eyes the entire time.

"So the past seven years that's where you've been? California."

"Yeah. I went through chemo a few times and basically lived in the hospital. I hated it there. I was basically the oldest patient and they all still treated me like a child. I still remember the day I cried because my hair was gone, I loved my long, blonde hair and now I had this pixie cut. My mom had to show me new ways to style it in an attempt to get me to calm down. Now I actually love it. After being in remission for about a month they decided to allow me to come back so I could be closer to Dr. Murray and because they could sense my growing discomfort with that hospital. They told me I was stable enough to come back to school but I had to be careful because they is still a great chance that my cancer could come back and when it does it will most likely be very bloody. The compromise I made with them was that I went back to school and in the case anything happens the teacher is to call Caleb to help me and he will tell them what to do next depending on how bad it is. All my teachers were notified of this but since I wanted to keep my cancer a secret the only information they were given was that I had health issues. When I saw my schedule and I saw Tori's name I immediately knew it was her, so she was also added to my contact list along with Caleb since she knows my condition from volunteering at the hospital."

"That explains the huge reaction you got out of Tori when you first showed up in class! We were all so confused as to who you were to get such an emotional response out of her."

"Yeah, it was emotional for the both of us. But I told her everything that day and made her promise not to tell anyone. She asked if you guys knew but I told her my original plan was to wait and see if I was still cancer-free after six months then I was going to tell you."

"Is that why she pulled you away from us after school that day?"

"Yup. She told me to think about the future as well as the present. Because even though I knew you all already, to you guys I was the new girl and I had to think about your feelings when I would eventually tell you the truth."

"I can see why she would tell you that. When I figured it out I was stuck. I didn't know what to think, what to say, how to feel, or even how to react. But is that why you had such a bad reaction from running to school that one day?"

"Well, what happened that day was since I was stable I decided for myself that that meant I could run. And when I got to school as you could see I wasn't able to breath, and I freaked out when Tori tried to convince me to go to the nurse or to call Caleb because I knew that would make it worse than I hoped it was. So I ended up falling asleep till lunch. When I woke up Tori told me to go eat and made me promise to tell my parents when I got home. But then when I was at lunch I got dizzy and well you know the rest."

As I finished I looked up at him only to find him already looking at me. I don't know what I thought his reaction would be but I was a little taken aback when I saw the tears gathering in his eyes.

"I can't even try to begin to imagine what you've been through Bea, or what you're still going through for that matter, but I want you to know that you no longer have to hide from me. I'm here for good and whether you like it or not I'm not letting you leave my side again. Like I said before, you can trust me with you're life. I want you to know that." I felt the tears gathering in my eyes as well, and knowing he felt that way was like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. So I did all I could at the moment.

I hugged him.

I hugged him like my life depended on it.

And he hugged me right back.


End file.
